My Weirdly Strict Dad: The Rules, The Frustrations, and the Love
Introduction
Rising up, most youngsters have a narrative a couple of sure form of parental rule. Maybe it was a curfew that appeared impossibly early, a ban on a favourite online game, or possibly only a seemingly infinite checklist of chores. However what in regards to the dads who took strictness to a different degree, those whose guidelines felt, properly, a bit of *bizarre*? The dads who weren’t simply strict, however oddly, uniquely, strictly so? That is the story of my weirdly strict dad, and the way navigating his guidelines, frustrations, and finally, his love, formed me into the particular person I’m in the present day.
My dad wasn’t simply *strict*; he was a *weirdly strict dad*. His model of self-discipline wasn’t nearly good grades and chores (although these have been undoubtedly current). It was a couple of particular form of management, manifested in ways in which typically baffled and sometimes irritated. Trying again, I notice that whereas these guidelines typically felt restrictive, even nonsensical, they have been undeniably part of who he was, and who he formed me to be.
Traits of a Weirdly Strict Dad
What outlined my dad’s model of strictness? It wasn’t simply in regards to the anticipated. It was about an virtually surgical precision utilized to on a regular basis life. The garments I wore, as an illustration, have been all the time below scrutiny. There was a really particular costume code enforced even on weekends, together with very explicit manufacturers and types. Then there was the food plan: no sugary cereals, minimal processed meals, a relentless reminder in regards to the significance of greens, which, in my adolescent thoughts, felt like a private assault on my style buds.
Curfew? Completely. However his wasn’t nearly getting dwelling by a sure time. It was the flowery follow-up questions. “Who have been you with? What have been you doing? Did they appear reliable?” It was a full interrogation. And even in case you have been dwelling on time, a random check-in was all the time doable.
The foundations concerning associates have been simply as particular. He vetted each single particular person I frolicked with, and the vetting course of wasn’t all the time nice. If a pal didn’t meet his requirements, they weren’t welcome, which typically made social life extremely tough. He had a really clear image of who he wished me to affiliate with, and that image did not all the time align with my needs.
Then there have been the hobbies. He had an opinion on every little thing, from the sports activities I performed to the music I listened to. This prolonged to my tutorial life, the place he continually monitored my grades, scrutinizing my efficiency with a discerning eye.
So, what was behind this meticulous management? His main purpose was, with out query, to maintain us protected. The world, in his eyes, was a harmful place, and his guidelines have been a defend. He anxious about every little thing: reckless drivers, unhealthy influences, the perils of the web. He was a worrier, and his anxieties fueled his strictness. He additionally wished us to succeed, to attain the form of life that he had envisioned for us, a life constructed on onerous work and self-discipline. He understood {that a} robust basis, a respect for guidelines, and a give attention to training have been the keys to success.
The Affect on the Baby and Household
The impression of a weirdly strict dad on a toddler’s life may be multifaceted. On one hand, it might breed resentment and a want to insurgent. The fixed strain, the sensation of being managed, the perceived lack of belief – it may be suffocating. There have been moments of frustration, of arguments, of slamming doorways. The teenage years, specifically, have been a relentless push-and-pull between my want for independence and his want to keep up management. The social restrictions typically made me really feel remoted, particularly when my associates had extra relaxed households. There have been occasions I felt like I couldn’t be myself.
But, it additionally instilled sure optimistic traits. The self-discipline he demanded taught me the significance of construction and duty. The emphasis on teachers drove me to pursue larger training. He ingrained the worth of a robust work ethic. I understood that onerous work led to rewards. He taught me to respect authority. I discovered to be organized and punctual, a trait I nonetheless worth in the present day.
The household dynamic grew to become extremely necessary, and the values he tried to instill, have been typically current. Although arguments came about, they have been typically out of affection. He additionally was decided to be the rock of our household and that willpower confirmed, even when his strategies have been typically, properly, *bizarre*.
Understanding the Dad’s Perspective
Understanding my dad meant understanding his background. He grew up in a time of nice financial hardship and needed to make many sacrifices. This gave him a deep appreciation for the worth of a safe future. His personal upbringing had been strict, formed by a demanding father. He was merely repeating a sample that he thought had labored for him. He was a product of his setting. This information did not excuse his conduct, however it gave me a context for it.
He wasn’t attempting to be tough; he was attempting to guard and supply. Whereas some guidelines appeared unfair or extreme, on the coronary heart of all of it was a profound love and a want for our well-being. I discovered that the foundations, regardless of how unusual, weren’t an act of malice. They have been, in their very own manner, an expression of care, a manifestation of his love, even when it felt suffocating. It was simply his manner of demonstrating his care.
Find out how to Cope and Thrive
So, how did one survive being the kid of a weirdly strict dad? It concerned a mixture of methods. First, it meant studying to navigate the foundations. This concerned understanding what he valued and what was negotiable. We discovered when it was finest to simply accept the foundations with out argument and when a respectful disagreement may very well be had.
Discovering your individual voice inside a inflexible framework is essential. I discovered to precise my wants and my emotions in a manner that wasn’t aggressive, but in addition wasn’t passive.
It additionally meant appreciating the nice. He taught us about loyalty, respect, and the significance of household. He supplied a steady dwelling, meals on the desk, and all the time confirmed his unwavering assist for us, even when we didn’t all the time see eye to eye on the finer factors. Remembering the love underlying his actions was key.
Lengthy-Time period Reflections and Classes Discovered
This expertise formed my life in some ways. It made me a planner. I’ve a robust sense of duty and a deep appreciation for stability. I’m extra organized than many individuals I do know, and I am fiercely loyal to these I like. I discovered to worth the significance of training and onerous work.
Extra importantly, it taught me empathy. I gained an understanding of how individuals’s previous experiences and motivations affect their conduct. I now have a substantial amount of respect for my dad.
There’s a degree of forgiveness that comes into play as time passes. Forgiveness for the occasions I felt constrained, the occasions I felt misunderstood, the occasions I felt irritated. Forgiving the failings and embracing the strengths. He wasn’t good, removed from it. However he liked me.
The journey of reconciling with a weirdly strict dad is not all the time simple. It is about understanding the supply of the conduct, recognizing the underlying love, and studying to understand the teachings, even those you did not notice you have been studying. It’s an ongoing technique of development and acceptance.
It’s about recognizing that whereas the foundations have been typically weird, and the strategies often misguided, the intent was all the time good. He did one of the best he may with the knowledge he had.
Conclusion
Rising up with a weirdly strict dad wasn’t all the time simple. There have been frustrations, arguments, and moments of feeling trapped. However as I look again, I notice that the restrictions, the calls for, and the unusual, uniquely tailor-made guidelines weren’t, at their core, about management. They have been about love, safety, and a deep-seated want to form us into one of the best variations of ourselves. They gave us the chance to be one of the best variations of ourselves. He taught us in regards to the significance of self-discipline, onerous work, and the enduring worth of household. It was a crash course in life.